First off, I hope everyone's Thanksgiving or Turkey Day was fantastic whether you spent it alone, with family, or with chosen family.
This year was a bit different for me. I
only got one day off so I was unable to travel. Usually I go home to
spend Thanksgiving with my parents and my brother. Some years we
migrate to Arizona and visit my Grandparents. My aunts, uncles and
cousins congregate there as well. This year it was just not feasible.
My title-spouse/sister NinjetKitty
organized a Fall Family Feast. I was unsure about going at first and
had received many invitations from friends to share their table. In
support of her, I decided that my partner and I would travel to
Edgewood (one of my favorite areas) and spend the holiday helping
with her event.
The potluck was glorious! People came
and went. Biscuit did an amazing fire dance. There are few things
anymore that captivate me, but she certainly did that night. My
sister/title-spouse had announced upon my confirmation of attendance
that I would be accepting donations of non-perishable food, gently
used clothing, shoes, blankets and backpacks for my own event. I
organized a Donations Drive for the Transgender Resource Center.
People brought bags and bags of clothes!
I am still going through and organizing
them as well as sorting the shoes so I can give them to a local
Bootblack by the name of Dani. Dani is running her own event through
Steel's Christmas Shining Bootblacks, which repairs and shines up
used shoes for distribution to those in need. So far, she is the only
local Bootblack participating.
Today was also the first time in a few
years that I've had any contact with a horse. My friends hosting the
event permitted me to feed carrots to their two horses, Angel and
Pokey. It has been so long since I've spent time with any horse. I
just wasn't up to it after my barrel horse Socks was put down. At 25
years old, it was finally time. Braiding Pokey's hair while he ate
out of my hand made the day extremely special to me. Pokey was blind
and Sock's vision was starting to go when she finally went down.
Standing with him and breathing in his wild scent almost made up for
not being with Socks when my parents made the difficult decision to
let her go.
I woke up this morning feeling
resentful and bitter. I began my holiday with a drink while I cooked
in the kitchen. My partner was very supportive. I loathed the fact
that I was unable to see my family. My parents are getting older. My
youngest brother is growing up almost as an only child because my
other brother and I are already out of our parents' house and
starting families of our own. I went through today with a heavy,
throbbing pain in my chest. I fought back tears more than once.
The day progressed and upon arriving in
Edgewood, I was welcomed into a house I did not know. I was embraced
by people I knew well, and those I would like to know better. Young,
old, friends, family, acquaintances...Our community came together for
an amazing dinner. We played games, laughed, hugged, reminisced, and
broke bread. Slowly my heart began to warm until I was overwhelmed by
the love and care of those present, whether it was in body or in
spirit.
I want to extend a sincere “Thank
You” to the following people (not necessarily in order):
My Title-spouse Ninjetkitty for putting
this wonderful event together with the help of her partner Horns and
for supporting me in my endeavor to donate to the Transgender
Resource Center,
Our Hostesses Master Bear and eve for
opening their safe space and home to “orphans”, for pushing me to
spend time with Pokey and Angel, for walking me through the hallway
of photographs, and for making me feel like family from that day
forward.
My partner Ranger for putting up with
me today and all days,
Everyone who showed up and made this
Fall Family Feast happen.
Thank you everyone. You made my holiday
that much less dark.
